Kurt Bell

A life of courage, joy and independence.

Growing Old

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That warm rock in the sunshine
A good place to sit
A worthy spot to indulge humility
Bask in simplicity
And enjoy the practice of principled self discipline

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A nice thing about being 50+ is the clearer understanding of one’s own specifications. A better grasp of what works well and what doesn’t within our own constitution. How far we can stretch both body and mind within the tolerance of intuition. Life’s sweet spots are revealed through the long act of living, while satisfied appetites teach with conviction just how much of anything is truly enough. It’s not fair that youth can’t enjoy this strong advantage. But then perhaps their blessing is the capacity to get by without such a comforting crutch.

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Regarding age, I’m going downhill fast. However, I’m definitely enjoying the decline. I wouldn’t want to be younger, as each advancing decade and year has proven better than the one before. Not in terms of quality, but of perspective and appreciation. I want nothing of my youth than to overcome its folly. Autumn is at hand. Winter will soon be here.

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As I grow older I have less interest in the out-of-doors. Save to visit those undomesticated thoughts which refuse to come in from the cold.

When I was young it was easy to go into the wilderness. But now it’s harder due to my aging body. Things like my failing eyesight, diminishing cognitive capability and more mature understanding of the dangers make me want to stay home more than when I was young.

That said. There are thoughts that I can’t meet at home and which I only ever encounter when alone in very wild places. Those thoughts won’t follow me home, and if I want to think them I have to visit them instead.

It’s a little like having an interesting relative in prison. Someone who has amazing things to say, but who will never come to you. You must always go to him. If I want to think those thoughts I need to get out of the house and go to the wild.

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I left for Japan craving something. And returned to America craving nothing. Such a change.