Kurt Bell

A life of courage, joy and independence.

Much money

I was thinking today of the recent excitement over the Powerball billions. Though I didn’t buy a ticket (kinda wish I had) I did share the thrill and sense of what if surrounding the event. I also remembered my own experience of coming into a large and sudden chunk of money (small beans by contemporary standards, though it was a lot to me then). In particular, I remember the wide and scary vista that was the unexpected side effect of sudden wealth, and being able to buy anything I wanted, and thinking all my problems were in the past. I jotted this memory down today in my journal, which entry I’ve shared below for anyone who might be interested. There’s more to wealth than champagne dreams and caviar wishes. There’s a pretty spooky side if you’re not ready. A downright destroyer in some cases.


Much money robs us of some comforting blinders. Opens our eyes to a fearsome truth. That money is no deliverance from our deepest pains. It’s just a comfort that we needn’t worry so much about paying for things we don’t really need.

With much money we discover we cannot hide. Can’t buy our way from dissatisfaction and resulting despair. And that’s a difficult place to be. As there’s nowhere to run. No hope when we’ve got it all and that’s not enough. At least when we were poor we could tell ourselves, if I just had more money.

Much money isn’t for everyone, though nearly everyone wants it. And I’ll take it too. Though first, let me prepare by learning to make do and be satisfied without.


11-28-2014 12-50-54 PM


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This entry was posted on January 17, 2016 by in Uncategorized.
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